Chaos De Profundis

2009-09-03T22:25:00.000-07:00

Without you I was a man, without you I'm a child...

2009-02-27T22:09:00.000-08:00

You hurt (me) in silence and abscence...

(original in spanish:
me dueles en silencio y ausencia...)

2009-02-18T22:57:00.000-08:00

I'll slowly going to erase you like I did the scar you left me to remember you by....even if it takes me my whole life to stop loving you...

(original in spanish:
Lentamente voy a borrarte como a la cicatriz que me dejaste para recordarte… aunque me tome la vida dejar de amarte)

2009-02-18T22:22:00.001-08:00

My words make no mistakes,it's your eyes that distort their truth...

(original in spanish:
Mis palabras no se equivocan, son tus ojos lo que distorsionan su verdad...)

2009-02-10T21:19:00.001-08:00

Once I was beautiful, once I was loved...

2009-02-06T18:15:00.000-08:00

Wake me only to breathe you...
...or give me sleep in your arms, your breast.

(original in spanish:
Despiértame solo para respirarte…
…o dame sueño entre tus brazos, en tu pecho.)

2009-02-01T22:33:00.000-08:00

The void in my throat that you provoke...
...and the fugacity with which you choke me.

(original in spanish:
El nudo en la garganta que me provocas...
y la fugacidad con la que me ahogas.)

2009-01-23T20:56:00.000-08:00

To live dreaming if you're not here with me...

(original in spanish:
Vivir en sueños si no estás aquí conmigo…)

2009-01-03T13:57:00.000-08:00

You exist only on my deepest dreams and eternal awake...

(Original in spanish:
Existes solo en mis profundos sueños y despertar eterno…)

2008-12-28T13:39:00.000-08:00

how she broke the stars from my sky, the hope from my eyes...

2008-12-16T08:04:00.001-08:00

Dreaming of you leaves me breathless

(original in spanish:
Soñar contigo me deja sin aliento…)

2008-12-03T21:59:00.000-08:00

...and I run away from the possibility of talking to you...

(original in spanish:
...y huyo de la posibilidad de hablarte...)

2008-12-03T21:57:00.000-08:00

Stop dreaming, stop waiting, stop breathing...

(original in spanish:
Dejar de soñar, dejar de esperar, dejar de respirar…)

2008-11-28T18:10:00.000-08:00

Surely there is no graver sin than loving as I love you...

(original in spanish:
Seguramente no hay peor pecado que amarte como te amo…)

[Inspiration from Nightwish's "Bless The Child" from the "Century Child Album":
'Why is the deadliest sin - to love as I loved you?']

2008-11-28T10:54:00.000-08:00

Who, if not a woman could inspire such sorrow in a heart?

(original in spanish:
Quien, si no una mujer podría inspirar tanta tristeza en un corazón?)

2008-11-26T15:11:00.000-08:00

My gift to you, is showing you once more all the love I feel for you...

(original in spanish:
Mi regalo para ti es, es mostrarte una vez mas todo el amor que yo siento por ti…)

2008-11-25T21:49:00.000-08:00

I know nothing of death, but I don't know how to name this life I have since you left...

(original in spanish:
No sé nada de la muerte, pero no sé cómo llamar a esta vida que tengo desde el día en que te fuiste…)

2008-11-25T16:31:00.000-08:00

..how horrible it is to spend my days thinking of you, knowing you don't think of me at all...

(original in spanish:
...lo horrible que es pasar el dia pensando en ti, sabiendo que no piensas ni un momento en mi...)

2008-11-24T14:34:00.000-08:00

Dying in your lips would be, perhaps, the most perfect sin I can commit.

(original in spanish:
Morir en tus labios seria, tal vez, el más perfecto pecado que podría cometer.)

2008-11-20T21:11:00.002-08:00

Without darkness to cover the light I feel so defenless...

(original in spanish:
Sin la oscuridad que cubra la luz me siento tan indefenso…)

2008-11-20T21:11:00.001-08:00

Do not confuse my uniqueness with your ugliness.
Do not misconstrue my dreams as your deepest nightmares.

2008-11-20T21:09:00.001-08:00

(To) Remember that my happiness is in you even if you're not here with me
(To make you) Remember that happiness is here, waiting for you to come back to me

(original in spanish:
Recordar que mi felicidad esta en ti aunque no estés junto a mí.
Recordarte que mi felicidad esta aquí, para cuando quieras volver junto a mí)

2008-11-20T21:05:00.000-08:00

How to heal a wound that never closes?
How to feel a kiss that's never given?
How to say the words you want to hear if you're not here with me?

(original in spanish:
Como curar heridas que no cicatrizan? Como sentir un beso que no se dio? Como decirte las palabras que quieres oír, si no te tengo junto a mi?)

2008-11-20T21:04:00.000-08:00

I sunk into the sky, walking upon the clouds
I walked away as I could from you and your memory
But my path took me back, to die at your feet...

(original in spanish:
Me hundí en el cielo, caminando sobre nubes, me aleje tanto como pude de ti y tu recuerdo, pero mi camino me trajo de vuelta, a morir frente a ti.)

2008-11-20T21:02:00.000-08:00

Eyes of fire that chills me
A breath that steals the air from me
And touch me again, kill me with a caress as light as the wind

(original in spanish:
Ojos de fuego, que me hielan. Un aliento que me roba el aire. Y tócame una vez más, mátame con una caricia tan ligera como el viento.)

2008-11-20T20:45:00.000-08:00

And light escapes from my hand, easier than water, more transparent than the ilusion of breathing again...

(original in spanish:
Y la luz se me escapa de las manos mucho más fácil que el agua, más transparente que la ilusión de poder respirar otra vez…)

2008-11-18T21:56:00.001-08:00

how much distance between wishes and kisses?

(original in spanish:
Cuanta distancia entre versos y besos?)

2008-11-17T18:12:00.000-08:00

..the horrible feeling of being in love and not being loved...

(original in spanish:
...la horrible sensación de amar y no ser amado...)

2008-11-17T18:03:00.000-08:00

...to choke back all my tears until I'm drowned by your abscence...

(original in spanish:
…a tragarme todas mis lagrimas hasta que me ahogue tu ausencia…)

2008-11-12T18:36:00.000-08:00

With my knowing, my eternity changed
And though the world died, I kept on breathing death
Time abandoned me
My silence made me loose you...

(original in spanish:
Sin saberlo, mi eternidad cambio
Y aunque el mundo murió, seguí respirando la muerte
El tiempo me abandono
Mi silencio me obligo a perderte…)

2008-11-09T21:07:00.000-08:00

Winds that never stop, storms that do not hurt...

(original in spanish:
Vientos que no cesan, tormentas que no hieren…)

2008-11-09T21:03:00.000-08:00

And give me canvas on your skin
To paint kisses on the curves
That have stolen my sleep
That have given me desire

(original in spanish:
Y dame un lienzo en tu piel
Para pintar besos en las curvas
Que me han robado el sueño
Que me han dado el deseo)

2008-11-09T21:00:00.000-08:00

To outshine stars
And leave the world behind
I could take you higher
If you'd let me set your skin on fire

2008-11-09T20:58:00.000-08:00

Yesterday is so hollow
I hold on to silence
And it's your absence
that kisses, insanity...

(original in spanish:
El ayer es tan vacio
Me abrazo al silencio
Y es tu ausencia
Que me besa,demencia...)

2008-11-09T20:52:00.000-08:00

That solitude is more bitter
Than to drink of your memory
And the night is far longer
Drinking only from silence

That sadness is so boring
Like watching time go by
And day are like a dream
Drinking only from your absence

(original in spanish:
Que la soledad es más amarga
Que beber de tu recuerdo
Y que la noche es tan larga
Bebiendo solo del silencio

Que la tristeza es tan aburrida
Como ver correr el tiempo
Y los días son como un sueño
Bebiendo solo de tu ausencia)

2008-11-09T20:50:00.001-08:00

Wondering, how long
Till I burn in this light
Wondering, if it's worth
The price of this sacrifice

For few things
Are valuable enough
That one should shed all skins
To be stripped to the bone

2008-11-09T20:43:00.000-08:00

That I could trap your smile for eternity...

(original in spanish:
Que pudiera atrapar tu sonrisa para la eternidad…)

2008-11-09T20:31:00.000-08:00

To walk on clouds and fly
To sail an ocean that never ends...

(original in spanish:
Caminar sobre nubes y volar
Navegar sobre un mar que no tiene final…)

2008-11-09T20:21:00.001-08:00

That my words could steal something else than a "thank you" from your lips...

(original in spanish:
Que mis palabras pudieran robar de tus labios algo más que un “gracias”…)

2008-11-09T19:49:00.000-08:00

words burning me,reflecting memories of desire long forgot

I spew endless lines of lies I comprehend no longer

Empty out my heart that I may empty out my mind...

2008-11-09T19:46:00.001-08:00

I hate so much that you contaminate my sight with all your lies...

I hate so much that I've let inside this horrible crimes...

2008-11-09T19:44:00.000-08:00

And how am I to breathe when all these things I give leave me an empty shell and yet I crave to empty myself ever more...

2008-11-08T17:07:00.000-08:00

...my soul is in Mars, head in the Moon, my heart in Mercury...

(original in spanish:
…el alma en Marte, la cabeza en la Luna y el corazón en Mercurio…)

2008-11-06T16:33:00.000-08:00

smiling unto the last breath...

(original in spanish:
Sonreír hasta el último aliento....)

2008-11-06T16:30:00.000-08:00

Hope you're as happy without me,as I was with you..

(original in spanish:
Espero que seas tan feliz sin mí, como yo lo fui contigo...)

2008-11-06T16:23:00.000-08:00

this uncertainty that fills me and pushed me to be something more than what I used to be,be something better for you (something happier to show)

(original in spanish:
Esta incertidumbre que me inunda y me impulsa a ser algo más de lo que fui,ser algo mejor para ti (algo que me haga feliz)

Unfinished Letter

2008-11-03T21:45:00.000-08:00

… and since I’ve known you I’ve loved you, since I lost you a day hasn’t gone by without thinking of you. And I wish I could turn back time but know that I can’t, but still I know that if someday you want my love again, I’ll be waiting for you. Here where I met you, ready to give it all to you…

(original in spanish:
...y desde que te conozco te he amado, desde que te perdí no ha pasado un día sin haberte pensado. Y quisiera poder dar vuelta atrás al tiempo pero sé que no puedo, mas sé que si algún día quieres de nuevo mi amor, te seguiré esperando. Aquí donde te conocí, dispuesto a dártelo todo a ti...)

2008-11-03T14:57:00.000-08:00

Don't ask me to love you again, for I'm not done loving you for the first time...

(original in Spanish:
No me pidas que te ame otra vez, aun no termino de hacerlo la primera vez...)

2008-11-03T14:54:00.000-08:00

...and sometimes I think even I don't know myself the way that you do...

(original in Spanish:
...y a veces creo que ni yo mism@ me conozco como me conoces tu...)

2008-11-03T14:51:00.000-08:00

A clearer division between reality and dream...

(original in Spanish:
Una línea más clara entre sueño y realidad...)

2008-11-03T14:47:00.000-08:00

A deeper dream...
A harder reality...

(original in Spanish:
Un sueño más profundo...
Una realidad más intensa..)

2008-11-03T12:34:00.000-08:00

Words fail me to say "I Love You"...

(original in spanish:
Me fallan las palabras para decirte ‘te amo’…)

2008-10-29T11:34:00.000-07:00

I wish you were like all the other girls,so that I could forget you as easy as I forget them...

(original in spanish:
Ojala fueras como todas las demás, para poder olvidarte tan fácilmente como a ellas…)

2008-10-29T11:32:00.000-07:00

And your words fill me with hope, but your absence and the distance take it away from me...

(originl in spanish:
Y tus palabras me llenan de esperanza, pero tu ausencia y la distancia me vacíana de ella…)

2008-10-29T11:31:00.000-07:00

And I´m slowy becoming what you wanted me to be, it´s a shame that you won´t be here to see it...

(original in spanish:
Y me estoy convirtiendo lentamente en todo lo que querías que fuera, lástima que no estarás aquí para verlo…)

2008-10-28T18:33:00.000-07:00

If having you was heaven, your abscence is surely hell..

(original in spanish:
Si tenerte fue ‘mi cielo’, tu ausencia es sin duda el infierno…)

2008-10-27T17:51:00.000-07:00

In you I find both my sweetest hell and my saddest heaven...

(original in spanish:
En ti se funden mi más dulce infierno y mi más triste cielo…)

2008-10-26T22:55:00.000-07:00

I dreamed of you, we were so happy...

(original in spanish:
Soñé contigo, éramos tan felices…)

2008-10-21T12:37:00.000-07:00

I'm as afraid of your words as I am of the questions you don't ask...

...the doubt that can be felt between us...

(original in spanish:
Tengo tanto miedo de tus palabras, como de las preguntas que no haces…

...la duda que se respira entre los dos…)

2008-10-21T12:35:00.000-07:00

for I can't conceive my happiness with your absence
and I can't understand how to erase your sadness with this distance...

(original in spanish:
Que no puedo concebir mi felicidad con tu ausencia
Y no entiendo cómo eliminar tu tristeza si existe esta distancia…)

2008-10-20T17:10:00.000-07:00

my dreams speak to me about you when you don't want to...

(original in spanish:
mis sueños me hablan de ti cuando tú no quieres hacerlo…)

2008-10-20T17:09:00.001-07:00

...I need to have something to hold on to something beside your memory...

(original in spanish:
...necesito abrazarme a algo más que tu recuerdo…)

2008-10-19T16:09:00.000-07:00

...that I've never been as happy as when I have you by my side...

(Original in spanish:
… que nunca he sido más feliz que cuando estoy junto a ti…)

(untitled)[fragment]{alternative version}

2008-10-16T19:07:00.000-07:00

...of my sadness and lonelines that die in your lips,
of my dreams and fears that fade in your hands...

(original in spanish:
...de mi tristeza y soledad que mueren en tus labios,
de mis sueños y miedos que se pierden en tu manos…)

(untitled)[fragment]

2008-10-16T18:59:00.000-07:00

...of my sadness and loneliness that die in your lips,
of my dreams and fears that hold on to your hands...

(original in spanish:
...de mi tristeza y soledad que mueren en tus labios,
de mi sueños y miedos que se aferran a tus manos…)

2008-10-15T16:22:00.000-07:00

A kiss, a moment, that will erase the distance, time and fear...

(original in spanish:
Un beso, un momento, que borrara la distancia, el tiempo y el miedo...)

2008-10-15T16:20:00.000-07:00

Your breath, that has given me life...

(Original in spanish:
Tu respirar, que me ha dado la vida...)

2008-10-13T18:18:00.000-07:00

And I will love you like I loved you before and no else has loved you after, without questions, conditions or doubts...

(original in spanish:
Y yo te voy a amar cómo te ame y nadie más te ha amado despues, sin preguntas ni condiciones…)

2008-10-13T18:17:00.001-07:00

That time and the distance are as long or as short as you want them to be...

(original in spanish:
Que el tiempo y la distancia son tan largos o cortos como tú quieras que estos sean…)

2008-10-13T05:46:00.000-07:00

Stricken with sadness
And abandoned by hope
Can't even remember why I'm crying
And I'm so lonely without your memory...

(Original in Spanish:
Me asola la tristeza
Y me abandona la esperanza
Ya no recuerdo ni porque estoy llorando
Y estoy tan solo sin tu recuerdo…)

2008-10-08T22:45:00.000-07:00

For sometimes I do not know the distance that keeps us apart
Or how to overcome it...

(Original in spanish:
Que a veces no se cual es la distancia que nos separa o como franquearla…)

2008-10-08T16:59:00.000-07:00

And find my place in the sky, to fulfill my deepest wish
To become one with the wind...

(original in spanish:
Y buscar mi lugar en el cielo, para cumplir mi más profundo deseo,
Ser uno con el viento…)

[Inspiration taken from Nightwish's "Ocean Soul" chorus:
Losing emotion
Finding devotion
Should I dress in white and search the sea
As I always wished to be - one with the waves
Ocean Soul]

2008-10-08T16:58:00.000-07:00

Beautiful insanity that kisses me softly...

(Original in spanish:
Hermosa demencia que me besa con ternura...)

2008-10-06T21:07:00.000-07:00

To build a heaven from the ashes of my dreams...

2008-10-06T21:06:00.000-07:00

I breathe only the air you exhale...

2008-10-06T21:05:00.001-07:00

When will you come to reclaim what I have made for you?

2008-10-06T21:03:00.000-07:00

Sincerely, my heart is all yours...

(Original in spanish:
Sinceramente, mi corazón es tuyo…)

2008-10-06T21:00:00.000-07:00

And I devote myself to making you smile....

(Original in spanish:
Y me dedico solo a hacerte sonreír…)

2008-10-06T20:57:00.000-07:00

I drown my sorrow with you memory...

(Original in spanish:
Ahogo mi tristeza con tu recuerdo…)

2008-10-06T20:56:00.000-07:00

The scars that mar, burn me forward...

Gospels of Chaos

2008-10-04T13:35:00.000-07:00

My latest work, a 13 part philosophical and semi-esoteric writting "The Gospels Of Chaos" can be found at Deviantart.

2008-10-02T21:30:00.003-07:00

Fear! I cleanse this wretched sin...

2008-10-02T21:30:00.001-07:00

The memory of an infinite kiss...

2008-10-02T21:22:00.000-07:00

Injected with melancholy...

2008-10-02T21:18:00.000-07:00

I can dream up a thousand days
But can't find the right things to say...

2008-10-01T17:59:00.000-07:00

Breathe deep, live free...

(Original in spanish:
Respirar profundo, vivir intenso…)

[This piece is dedicated to my friend Miguel Angel Borrell, a.k.a Maiky, a friend when I least deserve one, a challenge when I most need one...]

2008-10-01T17:56:00.000-07:00

Open wings rather than veins...

(Original in spanish:
Abrir alas y no venas…")

2008-10-01T17:53:00.001-07:00

Whispers of sorrow that fade away in the wind
Whispers of sorrow that fade away with time...

(Original in spanish:
Murmullos de tristeza que se desvanecen en el aire
Murmullos de tristeza que se desvanecen en el tiempo...)

2008-10-01T17:52:00.001-07:00

Black magic spilling from my mouth...

2008-10-01T17:51:00.000-07:00

And rise up banners of blasphemy against all reason...

2008-10-01T17:50:00.000-07:00

Reject the blessings for I thrive in pain...

2008-10-01T17:31:00.000-07:00

How to stay close and far from you?

2008-10-01T09:03:00.000-07:00

Your words could break heaven inside of me...

(original in spanish:
Tus palabras destruyen la poca paz que hay en mi…)

2008-09-30T21:19:00.000-07:00

She understood pain the day she stopped being a mother
He defined agony when he became a father...

2008-09-30T21:16:00.000-07:00

Inside the fever storm...

2008-09-30T21:15:00.001-07:00

The promise of her revenge...

2008-09-30T11:56:00.001-07:00

Within the storm is dying down...

2008-09-30T11:55:00.000-07:00

At peace with the demons in my head...

2008-09-29T17:04:00.000-07:00

That I could, perhaps, touch the stars...

(Original in spanish:
Que podría, quizás, tocar las estrellas…)

2008-09-29T17:03:00.002-07:00

To bury all my useless dreams, beneath my hatred for myself...